Change

Change-something that inevitably happens in life. Whether it’s a job change, a loss, a move, etc. changes can be hard to adjust to. Today I want to talk about different types of change and how to deal with them. As per usual, I’m no expert on this. These will simply be based on my own experiences.

Change #1: Moving

Moving out of your parents’ house is a big deal. If you are moving out on your own it can be scary but it also gives you a sense of independence. If you are moving in with a roommate or a partner, you have to be mindful of them. Moving is overwhelming at first But here are a few suggestions that may help you in the process.

1. Make a List

I know this may sound obvious but if you make a list of all the things you need to do before you move out, it definitely helps. For example, your list can consist of calling the electric company to set up an account or buying moving boxes at the U Haul store.

2. Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help

If you are lucky, you may have friends and family ask if they can help you on moving day. LET THEM. Erich and I lugged all our stuff on our own from our old apartment to the moving truck and it was exhausting! Having even one other person there would have saved us time and energy. Don’t get me wrong, people offered to help beforehand but we said we would be okay. Terrible mistake. Luckily, we asked for help with the unloading process. 

3. Make it Yours

Once you move out and move into your new place you might feel strange. You might miss your old place or feel like this new place isn’t really yours. That’s why you have to make the new place your own. Decorate it. Buy some furniture. Have people over to show it off. Whatever you have to do to make it feel like home.

Change #2: New Job

We’ve all been there. You start a new job. You’re anxious about what it’s going to be like. Questions like “Am I going to be able to do the job right?” Or “Will my coworkers like me?” come to mind.

The anxiety is quite understandable. But you have to have a positive mindset about it. Instead of thinking, “What if I do badly at my job?” Think about it as, “I”m going to soak in as much as I can and do the best that I possibly can.”

Just be nice to people and do your best. That’s all you can do. If things are meant to work out there for you, they will. Just give it a chance. Be willing to take information and learn. And show up on time. Change can be scary but it can also work out for the better.

Also, it’s important to remind yourself what drew you to this job in the first place. A new job is a new opportunity for growth. Be patient with yourself-give yourself time to take everything in. It may be nerve racking at first, but trying new things is the only way to grow

 Change #3: Breakups

Now breakups don’t only mean the end of a romantic relationship. They can also signify the end of a friendship. So how do we deal with the aftermath of a relationship/friendship?

1. Confidence is Key

Sometimes in the midst of a breakup, we can feel really down on ourselves. We may question if we made the right decision or if there is something we can change about ourselves. But it’s important to remember that you are a catch and that the right person will love you just the way you are. You, as you are right now, are enough. Don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.

2. Let them Go

If somebody no longer wants you in their life, let them go. If they don’t realize how   amazing you are, then say goodbye.The worst mistake you could make during a breakup is to beg a person to take you back. You have to let them go. No matter how much it hurts. 

3. Focus on Yourself

A breakup or the end of a friendship isn’t always a bad thing.The good thing about a breakup is that you now have time to focus on yourself. You can spend time pursuing hobbies, hanging out with friends or traveling.

4. The Future Awaits

Another good thing about going through a breakup is that it gives you more time to focus on your future. You can spend this time deciding on your career goals and such. You can plan your future, without having to take into consideration someone else’s opinions. 

Change # 4: Loss

One of the most difficult forms of change you can have in life is loss. Losing someone you love is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to go through. Unfortunately, there is no formula for coping with a loss. But here are a few things you can do to help you deal with this.

1. Self-Care

No matter how devastated you feel, you have to continue to take care of your body. Try to shower, eat, hydrate and sleep regularly. Try to move your body around too if you can.

These little things you do for yourself make the difference in the long run.If you think about it-the person you lost loved you. And they would want you to keep caring for yourself.

2. It’s Okay to not be Okay (To a Degree)

After you lose someone close to you, it’s okay to have a day where you are sad or angry. You are allowed to have days where you mourn that person. But if it’s impacting your life on a day to day basis you may want to consider talking to a therapist or venting to someone close to you about it. You are going to have times where you think of that person you lost and get sad. But when it impacts your daily routine where you can’t even go to work anymore or are taking drugs/drinking to deal with it, then it is time to get some help. 

3. Appreciate Friends/Family

After a loss, you are probably going to have a number of people baking you lasagnas and asking what they can do to help. Your friends and family want to be there for you and you should let them. You shouldn’t have to be alone during this time. Spend time with friends even if it means crying on their shoulder for a half hour or eating ice cream while watching a comforting movie. Plus it can’t hurt to have a few people around that can make you laugh. The person you lost loves you and would want to see you happy. Not alone in a room crying all the time. So let people in during this time. And appreciate the people that are in your life. You can do everything on your own if you want but it’s going to be twice as stressful and lonely.

Whether you are dealing with a loss or a move, I hope that this blog gave you some insight on what to do. Life is messy and therefore change is inevitable in life-whether we like it or not. Change can be good or bad but either way we become stronger because of it. I hope you all are staying safe and healthy out there. As always, thank you for reading 🙂